Hello there! I am SO EXCITED to share this Guest Post with you.
This guest post is brought to you by Elizabeth Brico @ Betty’s Battleground Blog.
You can view the original post @ Betty’s Battleground Here.
A quick note from me:
When I came across this Significant Other Challenge – it really pulled at my heartstrings. I try to tell my husband often how much I love and appreciate him. But you know what? I think everyone on this planet could tell and show their significant other that they love them more often- just because.
I think this challenge was an incredible idea and I really hope you join in and participate in this challenge! If you don’t have a blog then you can add your Significant Other Challenge in the comments below!
The 10 Things Elizabeth Brico @ Betty’s Battleground Loves About Her Husband Ricardo:
The S/O Challenge: Ten Things I Love About YOU Ricardo Brico
1. You Have A Unique Way Of Viewing The World
Like me, my husband loves to write. But our writing strengths are different. My strengths are in the poetics of language, while his are in descriptive observations. I am continuously impressed by his ability to notice tiny details and make insightful realizations about people and events; things that neither I nor anybody else I know would ever notice!
2. You Are Affectionate
My husband has had to crack through a pretty hard defensive shell that my trauma caused me to put up. It’s still there sometimes, even after almost five years together, but he never stops trying. A day does not go by that isn’t filled with kisses and embraces and cuddles. If he’s not around to give me a kiss, he makes sure to text me throughout the day and remind me that he loves me.
3. When You Try, You REALLY Try
It has been hard for me to come to terms with the fact that my husband sucks at remembering important dates. He has forgotten our anniversary more than once, my birthday…he’s even forgotten to get me gifts for Christmas. I hate that; it plays right into my fears of abandonment and exclusion. BUT when my husband does make an effort, which can either be on a special occasion or just randomly (maybe to make up for forgetting a special occasion) he goes all out. There was the birthday in Boulder when he carried a surprise special order vegan cake down the street, lit candles and all, to the bar where I was having my birthday party. There was Mother’s Day, when he had to work, but he still went out of his way to pick out prime ingredients and cook me a gourmet vegan lunch before he left. There was the day he randomly brought home a new copy of Fig even though we couldn’t really afford new things, just because he knew I really wanted it. It’s not always big gestures like that either; when he sees that I am having a trigger-heavy day he gives me a hug and takes over the parenting duties so that I can rest. He doesn’t always remember special dates, but when he wants to show he cares, he really makes an effort.
4. You Make Really Cool Music
I had to put this one in because he hasn’t been making music. Don’t get me wrong, I like my husband’s writing, but I really LOVE his music. He makes it using some computer program, I don’t really know anything about that, but I know that it comes out sounding really cool and unique and I wish I had more of it.
5. You’re A Great Daddy
By the way..that mess in the background…is now GONE! Finally! ALL GONE!
My husband works as a cook, which means he works a lot of nights. He doesn’t get to see our daughters as often as he, or I, or they would like, but he always makes sure to give them goodnight kisses when he comes home, and to spend as much time with them as he can. He plays with them, or when he’s just totally exhausted, he cuddles with them and watches their favorite cartoons with them. He’s a big Latino guy who grew up in a culture where men don’t usually change diapers or haul their daughters’ strollers around, but that doesn’t stop him from doing all those things. When he cares for them and plays with them, he really gets into it, and we all love him for it.
6. You Take Care of Anabelle At Night
Neither of our daughters sleep through the night. It’s super exhausting. Our littlest one still wakes to breastfeed throughout the night, and our older daughter has some kind of sleep issue that we have been trying to get diagnosed almost her whole life. She’s done a sleep study (which Rick accompanied her on), she had her tonsils and adenoids removed, she’s tried medication..nothing has helped. She still wakes up repeatedly throughout the night. My husband has not yet mastered the art of lactating so the breastfeeding duties fall to me. But, he takes care of Anabelle. Even when he’s exhausted from work, he gets up and helps soothe Anabelle back to sleep so that I can rest between night feedings.
7. You Go To Work
My husband has PTSD, just like me. Unlike me, however, he does not currently have anyone who caused it actively harassing him. For other reasons, his symptoms are generally less severe than mine. That’s not to say it’s easy for him, or that his symptoms don’t suck. They do, and I know he wishes he didn’t have to work. But one of us does have to work, and right now that’s him. And he does. Even though he’d rather not. Even though it’s exhausting, grueling work. Even though his boss makes him close on Saturday and open on Sunday, he shows up. And yes, he still takes care of Anabelle on Saturday nights.
8. You Make Changes When It’s Important To Me
My husband and I were raised in radically different backgrounds. He was raised in New Jersey and I was raised in Seattle. I was raised primarily by my mom. He was raised by both parents, but in a patriarchal household. He wasn’t much of a feminist when I met him, and I doubt he would proclaim himself one now, but he has listened when I have explained that some of his thoughts or actions are misogynistic, and has made an effort to change them. Sometimes those changes don’t happen as quickly or as drastically as I would like, but I have to remind myself that a lifetime of social conditioning can’t be undone overnight, and the fact that he is trying at all is pretty cool.
9. You Are Supportive Of My Writing
Photo caption: “I’m a writer.”
My husband has always supported my writing. He always encourages me to write, compliments my writing, and provides constructive feedback when I ask for it (and sometimes when I don’t). When I decided to start blogging, he never tried to stop me. Sure, sometimes he gets annoyed when he thinks I’m spending too much time at the computer, but he has also gone out of his way to find blogging books at the library and to reach out to blogger/techy friends of his to help me out, and he has even given me to the go-ahead to try to monetize it without focusing too hard on finding a paying job before I’m ready.
10. Sometimes You Bring Home Chocolate
Maybe those of you reading this think that bringing home chocolate shouldn’t take up a whole section, but you’re forgetting that I’m vegan. Vegan chocolate is not as easy to come by as Hershey bars, and it’s generally twice as expensive. Nonetheless, my husband will, every once in a while, randomly come home with a delicious chocolately treat. Will today be one of those days? Who knows..but I certainly wouldn’t mind a Ritters Sports Bar, Dark Chocolate with Marzipan, or a pack of Justin’s Dark Peanut Butter Cups.
So there you have it! Ten things I love about my husband. And yeah, it did work. I feel a lot less annoyed, and a lot more content in my relationship after sitting down, remembering, and writing these ten things I love about my husband. It was hard at first, but I feel like I could totally keep going! Except it’s a Sunday and there’s only so much time my daughters can spend playing with each other sans mama, so I’ll leave it at that.
Join me in the S/O challenge! Pin, bookmark, like, or otherwise save this page. The next time you feel annoyed or angry with your partner, open it up, grab this badge, and create your very own list of ten reasons why you LOVE the one you’re with. Then SHOUT IT TO THE WORLD!! Don’t forget to drop your link in the comments after you participate so we can all see what each other comes up with!
‘Til next time!
Te quiero baby!
Below is the badge and link to use when you participate in the significant other challenge!
When you create your blog post for the challenge, if you could kindly include a link back to my blog’s site so that if anyone has any questions etc. they can contact me to get help setting up their challenge. Thanks!
Here’s the link to include: http://www.bettysbattleground.com/2017/04/02/so-challenge/
Elizabeth Brico @ BettysBattleground.com
Elizabeth Brico is a speculative fiction writer, award winning poet and playwright, feminist blogger, DV survivor, vegan, and mama x3 living in the Pacific Northwest. She runs the blog Betty’s Battleground where she writes about living and parenting after trauma. She is seeking guest posters on a variety of topics related to mental illness/health. Check out her “Guest Post Info” page to find out more!
Great lifestyle tips don't have to end here...
Sign up and get more lifestyle tips delivered right to your inbox for free.
- First access to all new materials before anyone else
- Exclusive discounts for email subscribers ONLY
- Rare behind the scenes view of myself & the blog
Lastly, you will be able to email me at anytime - to ask questions and get my exclusive help - for free!
This isn't just another email list. This is a real friendship - with someone that is willing to be there for you 100% of the way.